Afterwards, I felt flat — not because anyone had done anything wrong, but because I’d absorbed the emotional and mental tone of the space more than I realised.

And I’ve found that this is something that happens often, especially as someone with a very open chart in Human Design.

My design is what we would call “open” — meaning I’m sensitive to the energy of the room, the people in it, and the stories that are being shared. I don’t just hear what’s being said — I feel the frequency of how it’s being said. 🎧💬 And without noticing, I can start to adapt to it, even if it doesn’t reflect who I am or how I want to feel. My sense of who I am and where I’m going changes depending on who I am with.

That experience reminded me of a question I’ve had to learn to ask myself: 𝘏𝘰𝘸 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘐 𝘣𝘦 𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘴 — 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘐 𝘥𝘰𝘯’𝘵 𝘴𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘪𝘳 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘷𝘦 — 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘭𝘰𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘺 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘯𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘰 𝘮𝘺𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧?

What’s helped is remembering that love doesn’t always mean ‘merging’. I don’t have to agree with everything to feel compassion. I can appreciate people for who they are and where they’re at, even when I don’t resonate with how they’re expressing it.

For me, it’s been less about protecting myself with armour, and more about having practices that help me stay grounded in my own energy. That includes noticing how I feel in real time, recognising when I start to shrink or disappear in a group, and giving myself permission to step back or shift the focus inward when I need to.

I know how important it is for me to have my own tools and practices that I can use to stay grounded in my own energy, and when it happens, to bring me back if I feel overwhelmed. They are simple, but surprisingly effective. They include:

• 𝘙𝘦𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘺𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘐 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘢𝘯 𝘰𝘱𝘦𝘯 𝘯𝘢𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐 𝘢𝘮 𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘴𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘳𝘨𝘪𝘦𝘴 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘰𝘰𝘮. 𝘐𝘵 𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘯 𝘮𝘺 𝘯𝘢𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘪𝘵 𝘪𝘴 𝘢 𝘨𝘪𝘧𝘵.
• 𝘕𝘰𝘵𝘪𝘤𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘺 𝘰𝘸𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨. 𝘞𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘦𝘹𝘱𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴 𝘥𝘰 𝘐 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘪𝘵𝘶𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯? 𝘊𝘢𝘯 𝘐 𝘭𝘦𝘵 𝘨𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘢 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘐 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮.
• 𝘙𝘦𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘺𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘐 𝘥𝘰𝘯’𝘵 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘮𝘢𝘵𝘤𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘳𝘨𝘺 𝘢𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥 𝘮𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘰𝘳𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘨.
• 𝘎𝘰𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘥𝘦𝘦𝘱𝘦𝘳 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘯𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘰𝘯 𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘯𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘰𝘱𝘪𝘯𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴. 𝘞𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘐 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘤𝘶𝘳𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴, 𝘪𝘯𝘷𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘳𝘨𝘺 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘰𝘰𝘮 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘴. 𝘞𝘦 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘥 𝘢𝘵 𝘢 𝘥𝘦𝘦𝘱𝘦𝘳 𝘭𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘭.

Often it is down to simple awareness. Awareness of what I am feeling in the moment. Awareness that I can choose what to take in and not. Awareness that underneath the the perspectives in the room, there are real people, each with their own experiences, fears, and intentions — often not so different from mine.

If you also have an open chart, or find yourself absorbing the energy of a room more than you’d like, know that it’s not a weakness. It’s a gift — one that allows for deep awareness and wisdom. But it’s also one that requires conscious tending. Because openness doesn’t mean emptiness. And empathy doesn’t have to come at a cost.

If you’ve had moments like this — where you feel like you’re losing yourself in group dynamics or emotional energy — I’d love to hear how you navigate that. Especially if you’re learning how to stay present without disappearing.